Shape Shifting

the mirror of life stares back at me
a history of those times once free
the many men I’d tried to be
the many worlds I’d longed to see
so many new realities
I lived in hopes of finding me

some were good and some were bad
there were happy times and sad
joyful moments and some quite mad
questing for the dreams I had

some lasted days, some only hours
some grew from seeds to lovely flowers
but then the moment finally came
when each went up in spirit’s flame

was I born a vagabond
to never settle down for long
to never truly quite belong
heart pulled on by distant song

lovers, friends, and passersby
I’ve known them all
said my goodbyes
but now, as I face the end
I wonder if I’ll fly again

the caterpillar exists to eat
the pupa then goes off to sleep
and in its sacred, silky place
transforms into a different face

and so I build my new cocoon
as life within me starts to swoon
in hopes that with the coming moon
I will stretch my wings once more
and fly away to distant shores

so begins my every day
shape shifting in the cosmic play

tio stib
2016, 2018, 2019

You might also enjoy: Paddling a Submarine vs. Living an Authentic Life, A Friend Passes

My Dementia Diary 25 – Life in Reverse

Noting my wife’s continuing mental deterioration from rational adult to simple minded child, I was reminded of a piece I saw George Carlin do some years ago. Bless his brilliant and irreverent mind, George has moved on to the great comedy stage in the sky, but he leaves many laughs behind him. I think his piece on “Life in Reverse” is all-time hilarious. Wouldn’t it be great if life actually worked this way-

tio stib

Life in Reverse By George Carlin

In my next life I want to live my life backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in an old people’s home
feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy,
go collect your pension,
and then when you start work,
you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.
You work 40 years
until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous,
then you are ready for high school.
You then go to primary school,
you become a kid,
you play.
You have no responsibilities,
you become a baby until you are born.
And then you spend your last 9 months
floating in luxurious spa-like conditions
with central heating and room service on tap,
larger quarters every day and then Voila!
You finish off as an orgasm.

I rest my case.

by George Carlin, 1937-2008

You might also enjoy: My Dementia Diary 24 – A Season of Endings, My Dementia Diary

A Friend Passes

it happened
in the depth of night
a wisp of wind,
a soul took flight

a smile
a laugh
a curious mind
flew off to join
the ghosts of time

as memories sweep
my shores of being
his waves roll on
cross seas unseen

I pause to think
what might have been
if life had passed
without my friend

tio stib, 2015
for George Forrester

You might also enjoy: Flavors of Friends; A Mirrored Smile

Wondering What I Will Be

I wonder if I’ll ever be
happy with just plain old me
accepting what the mirror can see
surrender to reality

stop playing the re-invention game
lusting after love and fame
stop playing other people’s games
hope the world will speak my name

I wonder who I will be
when I give up on changing me
exhaust all possibilities
get up one day and let it be

tio stib

You might also enjoy: Jumping Off, A Thousand Clowns

slack water

there is a gap between ebb and flow
the space between high and low
the moment between life and death
a pause as god’s catch their breath

the moon sighs and life sweeps in
the naked beach is lost again
hopes surge up on future’s shore
until, pulled back, they rise no more

this is our high water mark
the apex of our journeys arc
the moment when our heart will know
this is as far as we will go

summits failed, there is a slack
a moment when our soul looks back
regrets for what could have been
as waters fall away again

and skeletons of other’s lives
press into our tired eyes
exposing with advancing years
the nakedness of ancient fears

so move the tides of time
the rise and fall of humankind
and, so, each day, the moon will sigh
and pull and push
both you and I

tio stib
2017

You might also enjoy: Footprints, Desert of Dreams

A Thousand Clowns, a 1965 Film

“A Thousand Clowns” is a film about an eccentric, non-conformist comedy writer living in New York city. Based on a Broadway screenplay, this brilliantly written and superbly acted story is my antidote to feelings of being overwhelmed by societal pressures to fit in, especially as a writer.

Here is the YouTube link to the entire film, something for a dreary day.

A Thousand Clowns

Enjoy!

tio stib 2017

Life in Reverse, By George Carlin

In my next life I want to live my life backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in an old people’s home
feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy,
go collect your pension,
and then when you start work,
you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.
You work 40 years
until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous,
then you are ready for high school.
You then go to primary school,
you become a kid,
you play.
You have no responsibilities,
you become a baby until you are born.
And then you spend your last 9 months
floating in luxurious spa-like conditions
with central heating and room service on tap,
larger quarters every day and then Voila!
You finish off as an orgasm.
I rest my case.

George Carlin, 1937-2008