A Blind Man Makes an Omelet
I mean really
how can it be that difficult
crack a few eggs
stir briskly
pour some olive oil into the frying pan
turn the dial to medium heat
oh, almost forgot
add salt and pepper to the eggs and a dash of water
stir even more
that’s supposed to make the eggs fluffy
okay, here we go
pour the aerated egg mixture into the frying pan
now it gets a bit more tricky
because I can’t really see what’s going on
but following the memorized instructions
I use a spatula to gently loosen the slowly cooking eggs
prodding the edges towards the center of the pan
can’t say I can feel much here as the eggs have little mass
but I keep going round and round while
at the same time
occasionally lifting the pan and moving it from side to side
imagining that the egg mixture is slip sliding around
now the fun begins
I set the frying pan down and reach for the plate
of previously stir fried veges
still sending up warmth to my hovering hand
the instructions said place the veges on one side
of the nearly cooked eggs
I take my best shot
using the pan handle as a reference point
in go the veges
no cheese, I’m off dairy
my nose is beginning to recognize pleasant aromas
this is positive, as my nose also remembers
the acrid stench of previous burned food adventures
so far so good, now the final touch
the instructions said
gently fold half the egg mixture over the veges
then turn off the heat and let things finish cooking
I’m trying to remember which side I put the veges on
I probe about with the spatula and realize
that the veges are spread over most of the eggs
no matter
I slip the spatula under the egg mixture
guessing at what seems to be halfway across the supposed circle
then, with an air of gusto
I flipped half my omelet onto its other side
didn’t quite feel right
but it does smell inviting
I take a deep breath
sip some cranberry sparkling cider
bolster courage
then slide my culinary creation onto a plate
I can tell it’s not quite the desired half moon shape
as I hear several slight thunks on the plate
Okay, maybe the final result doesn’t look much like the pic on the recipe
which I couldn’t see anyway
but these were the best scrambled eggs
this blind man has ever made
tio stib aka uncle steve
I like your style, both literally and figuratively. Just do it! At least these days you know where most of your cooking utensils are located. Happy Christmas, Steve.
Yes, I do have a general feel for where the kitchen accessories are located. but it is unsettling when I reach for the egg on the counter and then hear a familiar “splat!” sound as the egg hits the floor at my feet. Thanks for stopping by.
My late husband Bill, who was totally blind, never cooked omelets. But he loved scrambling eggs, and they were pretty good. After two strokes paralyzed his left side, I did all the cooking. I tried but could never scramble eggs like he did. They were either too done or not done enough. I’ve given up, and the only time I eat eggs is when I go out or heat frozen breakfast sandwiches.
Your scrambled eggs sound delicious, though. As long as they taste good, that’s what matters.
I can feel your task and effort.
Thanks for stopping by.
It does sound like it ended as a delicious meal!! Wish you the best of the season and a very happy new year.
So good to hear from you. Thanks for stopping by.